I’m happy today because contractors are at our house helping to solve an architectural mystery. Take a look at this picture. Look at our driveway. Could you get into that garage?
It’s insane. You’d have to make practically a right angle to get into the bay on the right. If you managed to get into the left bay, which is possible if you have side mirrors that fold, you would either back into the basketball hoop or fall into the drainage culvert trying to get out.
We have all asked the question of why the driveway was built this way when it would have been just as easy for the builders to put the doors on the side of the house. It’s not worth trying to come up with any kind of rationale. It’s also not worth dwelling on the thousands of dollars we are spending to remedy the situation; we could have passed on the house, after all. We’re just going to fix it and then we won’t have to deal with it again. We’re both glad that the work is going to get done before the winter. Just like central air, once you have a garage, you can’t go back. Plus, our neighbor has offered to plow us out for free, which is sweet. The placement of the new driveway will lend itself to easy plowing: all the snow will be pushed off the end and down the slope.
So, the solution is fairly easy: step one is to remove the center post between the two doors and install one large door. Step two is to widen the driveway all the way down and curve it into the yard so we can make a straighter approach.
We almost had an aesthetic catastrophe on our hands before work even began. I spoke to the contractor the first time he came out. He gave me a product sheet with the garage door color options on it. When he came the second time, Joe talked to him while I was in the shower. The day before he was due to rip out our doors, my dad happened to ask, “So what color did you decide to go with?” and neither of us had any idea. We each assumed the other had taken care of it. Then we checked the contract and it said standard white. With our house and trim colors, that would have looked like hot buttered ass. We had to call the contractor, confess our doltishness, wait while he checked with the distributor and push back the work by a week.
Tomorrow, however, the door will be installed. It will be 16 feet wide and a lovely shade called Almond. It will have a monster electric opener. I’ve never been so excited about a home improvement project before. I almost hope it snows the day after the driveway is finished. Almost. Jesus. Give us a few weeks before that fresh hell descends.
It’s insane. You’d have to make practically a right angle to get into the bay on the right. If you managed to get into the left bay, which is possible if you have side mirrors that fold, you would either back into the basketball hoop or fall into the drainage culvert trying to get out.
We have all asked the question of why the driveway was built this way when it would have been just as easy for the builders to put the doors on the side of the house. It’s not worth trying to come up with any kind of rationale. It’s also not worth dwelling on the thousands of dollars we are spending to remedy the situation; we could have passed on the house, after all. We’re just going to fix it and then we won’t have to deal with it again. We’re both glad that the work is going to get done before the winter. Just like central air, once you have a garage, you can’t go back. Plus, our neighbor has offered to plow us out for free, which is sweet. The placement of the new driveway will lend itself to easy plowing: all the snow will be pushed off the end and down the slope.
So, the solution is fairly easy: step one is to remove the center post between the two doors and install one large door. Step two is to widen the driveway all the way down and curve it into the yard so we can make a straighter approach.
We almost had an aesthetic catastrophe on our hands before work even began. I spoke to the contractor the first time he came out. He gave me a product sheet with the garage door color options on it. When he came the second time, Joe talked to him while I was in the shower. The day before he was due to rip out our doors, my dad happened to ask, “So what color did you decide to go with?” and neither of us had any idea. We each assumed the other had taken care of it. Then we checked the contract and it said standard white. With our house and trim colors, that would have looked like hot buttered ass. We had to call the contractor, confess our doltishness, wait while he checked with the distributor and push back the work by a week.
Tomorrow, however, the door will be installed. It will be 16 feet wide and a lovely shade called Almond. It will have a monster electric opener. I’ve never been so excited about a home improvement project before. I almost hope it snows the day after the driveway is finished. Almost. Jesus. Give us a few weeks before that fresh hell descends.
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