It's 70 degrees and sunny today, absolutely gorgeous. This morning I hung around to wait for the HVAC guy to come back. I opened the door to a smiling technician and a warm, perfect, wonderful spring day, the kind that makes you want to lie in the grass and smile at the sky like a moron, thinking about daffodils and butterflies and puffy clouds and bike-riding and lilacs.
After he was finished and took off, it was 9:45. I sat in my living room, stewing in pissy, petulant thoughts: "Stupid work clothes. Stupid long-sleeved shirt, stupid boots, stupid black pants, you all suck. Stupid low-pressure system coming in tomorrow. Stupid quarterly report due today; if not for you I could take the day off. Stupid work. Fuuuuuuck."
I couldn't go in, not then. I made a few calls to make sure things were in order, because you know it only takes you thinking about not being in the office to unleash a flood of urgent emails and frantic "WHERE ARE YOU?" voice mails. In fact, my coworker informed me that five minutes after I let her know I wasn't going to be in until later, our boss called for me. I don't know why--he's supposed to be driving to upstate NY to visit his son at college. That's just the kind of makes-no-sense shit you can count on happening when you have something better to do.
Not that I did. I was already dressed for work and not about to change, so something constructive like a walk or a bike ride weren't going to happen. I'm ashamed to admit I went to the mall. I know, I didn't even spend my time outside, unless driving on the highway with the sunroof open counts. I spent most of it in a dressing room at Motherhood Maternity, becoming exasperated by their inconsistent sizing. But it felt great to be out doing what I wanted to be doing, not sitting at my desk breathing recirculated office air and watching the whole day go by through the windows that don't open.
It's still too nice to be here.
After he was finished and took off, it was 9:45. I sat in my living room, stewing in pissy, petulant thoughts: "Stupid work clothes. Stupid long-sleeved shirt, stupid boots, stupid black pants, you all suck. Stupid low-pressure system coming in tomorrow. Stupid quarterly report due today; if not for you I could take the day off. Stupid work. Fuuuuuuck."
I couldn't go in, not then. I made a few calls to make sure things were in order, because you know it only takes you thinking about not being in the office to unleash a flood of urgent emails and frantic "WHERE ARE YOU?" voice mails. In fact, my coworker informed me that five minutes after I let her know I wasn't going to be in until later, our boss called for me. I don't know why--he's supposed to be driving to upstate NY to visit his son at college. That's just the kind of makes-no-sense shit you can count on happening when you have something better to do.
Not that I did. I was already dressed for work and not about to change, so something constructive like a walk or a bike ride weren't going to happen. I'm ashamed to admit I went to the mall. I know, I didn't even spend my time outside, unless driving on the highway with the sunroof open counts. I spent most of it in a dressing room at Motherhood Maternity, becoming exasperated by their inconsistent sizing. But it felt great to be out doing what I wanted to be doing, not sitting at my desk breathing recirculated office air and watching the whole day go by through the windows that don't open.
It's still too nice to be here.
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