When we were growing up, it was a big deal when the networks unveiled the new shows each fall. You'd see all the promos, decide which ones you wanted to check out, and set your mental prime-time schedule. Back then you could count on there being at least two solidly entertaining new ones each season (e.g. The Wonder Years, My So-Called Life, Felicity). Then there were a few mediocre ones that everyone watched but nobody knew why (Blossom, Golden Girls, Doogie Howser MD), a couple that sucked but you watched them because they were before or after something (A Different World, Empty Nest), the ones your parents watched (Dynasty, Cheers, Everybody Loves Raymond), the ones everyone watched but me (Party of Five, Buffy the Vampire Slayer), and the old faithfuls (Who's the Boss?, Growing Pains, Friends, Seinfeld).
These days, the fall lineup doesn't even exist in my world. I couldn't care less. It's not that I don't like TV, it's that sitcoms suck. I can't handle another show about a family with a stupid father, which only works as a cartoon or a farce (The Simpsons, Family Guy, Married with Children), or another overwrought drama about bratty, precocious teenagers (Dawson's Creek, the OC), or another "reality" show, or some show that has had so much hype that I can't even stomach it even if it is good (CSI, House, NYPD Blue, Nip/Tuck). I can count on one hand the number of network shows I've actually liked in the past 5 years: Freaks and Geeks, Andy Richter Controls the Universe, 24, and 8 Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter, which went south after John Ritter died and they brought in David Spade, one half of the twin harbingers of television doom (the other being Andy Dick).
There was actually a show on yesterday that wasn't bad: How I Met Your Mother. Neil Patrick Harris was in it--he's going to achieve cult status, I'm thinking... NPH, man, tripping balls. Jason Segal was in it. Allyson Hannigan was in it. Even though it was about a bunch of 20-somethings living in New York and there were lots of lame sex jokes, it was semi-watchable.
I don't even have time to get into all the BAD shows that fill up the airspace at our house, like the Surreal Life and My Super Sweet Sixteen. I can't believe I watch that shit. But sometimes I do. And I watch Ghosthunters. And shows about planets. And Unwrapped. And Great Hotels.
But you know what's entertaining as hell? Breaking Bonaduce. I hope you're all watching it. That show that will send your self-esteem through the roof.
Editor's note: How could I forget about The Office? BBC and American. They both rule.